the feelings I had was genuine..
even though the stabs of wound are there... love is there...
but love will be there reserved in the deepest place...
no actions, no words... nothing could touch it...
the purest of mine will be hidden..
cause I knew I had loved with all my might...
and that I have no regrets...
and that one day the person who would regret is definitely not me,who indeed do cherish the togetherness...
and that some day someone will regret the immature way of ending things...
and that is the weakness that someone will carry throughout the whole life...
as it is in the blood... the immature ability to handle things...
and the illusion that relationships are a bed of roses and there shouldn't be any thorns at all...
and that would be the life he choose... a practical one where 'use' and 'to be used' are the only principles that guide his survival...
And I, with such experience, know that despite my heart felt emotions, 'use' and 'to be used' isn't in my context...
and that 'to love' and 'to be loved', to tolerate, to sacrifice, to willingly give sincere devotion, to guide each other,to enlighten, to brave the ugly torments together, and yet still be able to stay in love, to receive both happiness, anger, sadness with acceptance that those are part and parcel of life are the principles I hold... that is the understanding and preparation that should have been considered before taking someone seriously as a life partner...
or are the insights of the opposite in this human world are always in terms of 'to use' and 'to be used' context?
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