Certain Matters...

When I thought I had completely buried it, it flickers... Giving hope...
Why now? The fire burns when i touch it...
It was supposed to die out on that windy night - a magnificant sight of stars overhead...
I had licked my wounds dry... These have turned numb...

When they are about to harden, heat was generated from within, the cracks deepen, succumbing to the heat, a mere warmth a little warmer than the human body temperature... I feel the pain of the long sealed... the long lost hope, the impossible longing...

Why did it just happened? It ain't supposed to happen... I don't want it to happen..But i couldn't help it... I knew i would bury it over and over again as the fire will lit as soon as it is forgotten, melting down my wounds, burning them deeper than ever, reminding me of the amber that i longed to forget... It's glow haunts... I'm helplessly under it's spell... Or is it my own fantasy and imagination? Perhaps... Because it had never promised the warmth that I had wanted and desired...

An idiot i am... but i will continue to guard the amber... though it might cost my lifetime...
Perhaps one day the amber would be broken down by microbial action or natural erosion, just, maybe it would... someday...

The time interval...

I'm sure those who were going bowling... hmm...not going... were there because of the same reason of playing a game or two of bowling had blogged about the incident this morning...yea, saw it in the post of a few friends linked here...

I could not believe that the roof had gone off just like that. Okay, we were at the scene... 15 minutes after the incident happened...Someone who had arrived earlier had called to tell that our bowling plan was ruined because of the unexpected event... Seriously, we had thought that it was merely a prank done by the caller to frighten us...

After arriving at the scene... It was really an eye opener...the roof looked limped... Steel bars dropped... It was horrible... of course there was a big crowd hanging around to snap shots of it... It happened 10 minutes before we got there... An ambulance had already arrived...but there were no sign of police and other local authorities there yet...

Nee: hey, sending the photo of this scene will surely win us rm50 in The Star newspapers...

Lyn: Too late, the reporters are here...

The stadium which stood majestically for less than a year looked like a tumbledown building... This should be a lesson for future contractors and workers...Do not save on material usage... Saving it means costing yet another disaster, an embarrassment to the country... It has decreased the trust of others and the grassroots...

Thus for Malaysia to be truly Boleh, Start by nurturing human capital who has the correct mentality and good sense in BUILDING up the nation, not solely self interest...

Ignorance...

Ignorance = naive= knows nothing about...
Well, most of us know, ignorance is a serious problem if we want to survive in the society...
Ignorance in a small kid is called naive = not knowing completely or entirely the world outside the safety zone called home...
ignorance in politics if you are a political leader is unforgivable...
if you are a member of the grassroots, it matters or not depends on individual opinions (maybe most choose to care not)...
basically, ignorance in general knowledge is growing in the younger generation...
chances of being manipulated, puppeted, and cheated are high...
lots of happenings around give us lessons, lessons that we must learn in order to survive...
sometimes pretending to be ignorant is not an ignorant decision at all, it indicates that you are alert...
alert in the matters happening around you, thus keeping a safe distance from whatever it is as it might bring harm, unhappiness, evil upon you...
being ignorant doesn't mean that you are really ignorant...you are deceiving others only...physically... emotionally, mentally not in every aspect... as you yourself know, god knows and maybe some who are in your circle know...
learning the ways of being a street wise person through the ignorant ideology...
many did quite successfully in gaining what they want through this way...
Thus, be ignorant when you are alert isn't a bad idea after all...

Time at Home!

Reached home... The warmth of home enveloped me... The familiar smell... the kampung scenery... It's great to be home...

Going to be a zai nu or not? lol...

When days are nights,
when meals are simple.
Satisfaction calms the restless soul,
Frustration loses track of me.
I'm tugged in the cocoon, my old cocoon...
though it fits me not,
I insist being in it...
Let the wind blow,
let the fire flare,
let the rain pour,
let floods roar...
My home is always the place where
i find true safety and secure,
though not a bud anymore,
neither am i a bloom... yet...
so, home is where leaves cover me,
tendrils-evil resistant...
but when leaves are leaves,
that's the time when i have to be the leaves,
til i, one day are among the leaves too...

My first Birthday Away from Home!^^

I didn't really expect any birthday celebrations because usually my birthday passed without any grand celebration. Receiving only birthday messages from friends...

It was a wonderful experience as there were two surprises that night. One thrown by Pei Hwa and her classmates, the other by my roomie and her classmates... It was really wonderful... i want to thank all those who had sent me wishes during my big day... Thank you very much!!!

some kind of tradition

with roomie... Wana thank her for such a big surprise because she had acted so normally before that... It was quite a surprise...

the first surprise... thanks for the presents Hwa and the rest (Hui ying, natalie, yen jie, yen an, si ting, mei yin, mei jiun, yien, carmen, vicky)...

OOh, yea.. and thank you, Liyana for the second birthday cake today..The cake you have made was delicious... Happy birthday to my other twins Akila and Nadia... Happy Birthday to both of you too!!!^^

During Wesak Day, I...

I had to miss the Wesak Day celebration in my hometown this year, but fortunately the Wesak Day was also well spent here in JB... It was fun, taking part in sign language competition and performances...Itt was ages since i wore makeup and during this occasion I had to have it done...Luckily the makeup wasn't so thick, or i'll look like a clown...

Owyang and I

Our group of performers

A thousand words in pics...

Came back from Kedah at last... Had so much fun during the English Camp... My forum turn out to be quite okay though I need to overcome my habit of saying 'umm' s all the time as i was thinking of how to convey my message across to the audience... I manage to get a feed back from an audience, it seemed that i was speaking clear...Let these pictures express the new memories that I have had during the English camp... My skits performances was the best it seemed because I had a sudden bravery which allowed me to act out whole heartedly... Gain new friends, new experience and new memories...

new friends Wen AI and Sabrina

school visit

with IPSAH teslians

with madam ong